Back to the basics

So after much soul searching and little sleep I realized that I have a problem. And I don't think I'm alone but I alone can work on it.

I struggle with insecurity. And when you add that to a bad history of relationships and a habit of giving up your own interests when in one, it's a real bad thing.

I gave my apologies to the great guy I was seeing. I totally lost my shit this past week. And I didn't really see it coming when I probably should have.

And like most of life, there are no do-overs. I need to pick myself up and try to figure this shit out for once and for all.

Today that meant I didn't crawl back in bed. I went for a run - well a walk/run and to the library and grocery store. Lucky for me a girlfriend kept me company via chat on her phone. And agreed to run a 5k with me in a couple of months and do some training together. Next up some low-cal lunch stuff at the store since some weight gain hasn't helped either.

I found a great article here that actually described to a "t" what has gone on. And gave real advice on what to do. I don't imagine I'll be fixed up right away but every little step forward is a good thing.

Win some and lose some

Apparently my overly analytical and hot headed self is too much to handle. I actually like having some plans of my own, looking forward to them and following through.

Guess I suddenly have more time for renos and the gym again.

Wagon? What wagon?

Back tonight for the first time in months...it was a painful experience. I'm literally icing a shin and hoping the feeling of lungs on fire will fade.

5 and 1s...ugh. 5 minute walks and 1 minute runs
5k in 49 mins

Chasing the wagon 1 week at a time

Got back to the gym tonight in time to do my 5k on the elliptical only.

I also started some enzymes and a super duper pro-biotic this week to take care of what could be an overgrowth of yeast apparently - causes fatigue, sugar cravings, crazy pms among other fun. However my stomach doesn't love the enzymes or I apparently used them to discover I have an ulcer starting...awesome! Suddenly the yucky yeast cleanse isn't sounding so bad...

5k on elliptical in 31m 55s

Goal is to get back again in under 7 days.

Found the wagon and then found dessert

Ok so I fell off the wagon for 3 weeks.

It started with trying to get some renos done. Installing laminate flooring actually caused my body to complain more than workouts do.

Then company arrived.

Then some more renos in the form of baseboard installation.

Then company arrived. This company makes the wagon chase her.

So back to the gym I went; on a Sunday morning. Which just seems wrong on many levels.

I had my best elliptical time in ages. Go figure. Then we went to Olive Garden and I ate too much. My weight problem has not improved during my gym hiatus and I have actually been eating pretty healthily. My GP had no explanation either. Starting up vitamins about a month ago does seem to be helping with fatigue.

So for now it's time to revisit chasing the wagon, eating healthier, taking my vitamins and maybe consider a visit to a naturopath.

5k in 31m 34s
most of a weight circuit but the addition of free weights for arms